


candy apples and tidal waves

by stellalunar



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: "i kind of like you", "oh thats cool bro", Confessions, Headcanon, M/M, Slice of Life, Summer, bittersweet? but more sweet than bitter, but it's ok because minho's there, jisung is a little sad, long talks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-09
Updated: 2020-03-09
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:14:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23073016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellalunar/pseuds/stellalunar
Summary: "hey, jisung?"jisung opens his eyes slowly."yep," he breathes out, brushing a tangle of bleached blonde hair out of his eyes."i think i like you."
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know
Comments: 8
Kudos: 239





	candy apples and tidal waves

**Author's Note:**

> no sleep, martin garrix and bonn

"i have a question," minho's voice cuts through the sweltering heat of the sun. 

jisung doesn't take his eyes away from the clouds in the sky, but he hums quietly in acknowledgement. despite the fact that his hair's dampening with sweat and it feels like his throat's stuffed with cotton, he has no will to get up from the grass where he's lying. 

"are you sad?" 

there's a shift in the breeze and the warm air seems to turn cooler as a draft causes the blades of grass beneath his fingers to tremble slightly. for the first time in a long time, jisung's heart feels light and his mind is empty, but he doesn't know how to answer the question. 

perhaps because his answer is yes. but what even is sadness? because the media displays sadness as grief from a death, or cutting off all your hair after someone breaks up with you. jisung's not that kind of sad. he's not sure if he even deserves to be sad when he's supposed to be living such a perfect life. 

a songbird calls out sweetly somewhere in the distance and jisung swallows thickly around the gauzy feeling in the back of his throat. 

"sometimes," he answers.

out of the corner of his eye he sees minho turn his head so he's looking at him, but he stays perfectly still. he doesn't have to look to know minho's lips are stained cherry red from the popsicle he'd been sucking on a few minutes ago, doesn't have to look to know the trees are leaving trails of sun-dappled shadows on his cheeks. 

"i thought so," minho says quietly. 

there's something in his voice that jisung can't pinpoint, and he isn't sure he wants to. the heat leaves him feverishly restless and without a response to the question at hand. it kind of feels like he's drunk, though he tries to avoid that as much as possible. firstly because he's in the public eye, and secondly because drowning his anxieties in alcohol never seems to pay off. his thoughts are hazily swimming together and tangling up until it's hard for him to distinguish one from the next. 

minho is close enough to him for him to be able to smell that pineapple-mango shampoo he insists on buying from the store. while jisung kind of thinks it smells more like sickeningly sweet coconuts than mangos, he doesn't bother telling minho that. 

there's a sort of swirling in his chest that he can't distinguish when minho stretches his arm a bit further until his fingers bump jisung's. he waits for minho to pull away, but the older boy's fingers rest on top of jisung's like it doesn't matter. 

jisung lets out a shaky breath he hadn't known he'd been holding and draws in another vaguely pineapple-scented inhale. 

"how come?" jisung asks finally, letting his eyes flutter shut. the sunlight still paints orange shadows that he tries to identify as shapes when his eyes are closed, but they dance away as blobs. 

minho's fingers shift slightly, and then jisung feels his hand being lifted and turned so his palm's facing up. 

"i dunno, you just seem like it sometimes," minho responds. 

his tone is carefree, and jisung wonders why it is that he doesn't seem to find him weird for it. jisung's expected to constantly be happy and worry-free, but boy is it exhausting every once in a while. he can't bother telling chan that because chan's got enough to worry about on his own. he remembers when smiling used to hurt a little less, when his laughs used to come out a bit more free than they do these days. 

it's a part of life, though. at least, that's what his mother tells him. everyone gets sad every once in a while. jisung is weak for trying to tell people about it. that's why jisung no longer calls home, nor does he pick up calls when they come his way. he doesn't need to be lectured about that anymore. he knows it in himself. 

"hey, jisung?" 

jisung opens his eyes slowly. 

"yep," he breathes out, brushing a tangle of bleached blonde hair out of his eyes.

"i think i like you."

it causes a hitch in jisung's breath, but that's all it does. he doesn't know if he expected to be more surprised, but the confession seems to settle somewhere warmly in his chest, like it'd been dipped in the sun's warmth before sinking into his heart. 

it's _hot._

and suddenly it's _hotter_. 

"like you're my best friend?" jisung asks weakly. 

"i don't think so," minho answers after a few seconds, and it takes jisung that long to register that minho's fingers are quivering slightly on top of his. 

the songbird continues to tweet, and jisung bites at his bottom lip that's already chewed raw and bright pink. it stings a little bit, but it keeps him grounded. 

"cool." 

"yeah?" 

"yeah." 

jisung's head is still a tangled mess, but it only takes a few minutes of work before he manages to untangle one of the thoughts in there. 

"hey, hyung?" 

it's minho's turn to hum in response now, and jisung turns his head to look at minho for the first time. 

the older's eyes are trained on some flower that's sprouted out of the ground. his skin glows golden under the sunlight and the arch of his cheekbones create curved shadows. jisung always marvels at the fact that his face is so perfectly sculpted. 

artfully tousled brown hair rests against the grass in waves, and clear brown eyes blink the sunlight away. 

"i think i like you too." 

minho finally looks up at him, and there's something new in his eyes that jisung can't recognize. 

"that's good, because i was starting to wonder how much longer i could hold up." 

his lips are stained the color of fresh wine and all of a sudden jisung wonders why it's taken him this long to realize that he wants to kiss them. 

"why are you sad sometimes, jisungie?" 

jisung breathes out again and closes his eyes. that is a question he wishes he knew the answer. 

"because life," jisung responds softly. 

if he and minho haven't suffocated yet, maybe they'll be okay. it's freakishly hot outside and it's leaving jisung feverish and tired. his heart seems to weight down again, all of a sudden, like minho's words are weighing heavy in his chest. he feels glued to the ground. 

"is it hard to be happy?" 

jisung opens his eyes to look at minho again. the older boy's propped himself up on one elbow and he's tapping his fingers on jisung in a rhythm that seems to repeat itself over again. the dip of his fingernail taps jisung's callused palm every once in a while and it seems to leave that area tingling behind it. 

"sometimes," jisung says again. "its--" he pauses. 

should he be scared of scaring minho off? it's weird that the way his mind works seems to drive so many people away from him. 

"it's okay if that scares you, though." 

he literally feels minho tense up. his fingers freeze and it seems like the wind stops blowing for a second too, leaving jisung to boil alive in the summery heat. 

"jisungie, love," and the nickname _literally_ makes jisung's heart skip two entire beats before continuing its rhythm. 

"why would it scare me?" 

jisung bites the inside of his cheek and thinks of pineapples and mangos and happy places. "people leave fast," he offers.

it's a horrible explanation, but suddenly minho's entire hand is wrapped around his and they're intertwining fingers. 

_cherries and coconuts and pretty green leaves blowing in the wind,_ jisung thinks. _candy apples and tidal waves and everything sweet and salty all at once._

minho's hands are just as rough and callused as his, but for an entirely different reason. minho spends hours at the gym with his hands wrapped around metal bars and weights. jisung spends all that time with his hands strumming the strings of his chipping guitar. the woodwork used to be glossy and smooth to the touch, but years of wear have left it dented and scratched. he lost his picks ages ago so he relies on his fingers now, leaving them scarred and callused. 

a cloud covers the sun for a second and the heat dissipates for a minute before he feels minho's hand squeeze his. 

and the older boy doesn't _say_ anything. 

_i'm not going anywhere._

and maybe he's stupid for it, but jisung believes him. he squeezes back, maybe a bit harder. 

maybe jisung is sad sometimes. but that's life, as he's told. 

"can i kiss you?" 

"yeah." 

_strawberries and summery heat, blue electricity wires and thunder._

"it's hot outside," minho points out when they pull apart. 

jisung drops his head and laughs breathlessly. 

"yeah." 

**Author's Note:**

> i have such horrible writer's block and that's my excuse as to why i write such trash :)  
> this is the first thing i've managed to finish in months pls excuse me


End file.
